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Saturday, September 3, 2016

Soka Gakkai and codependency a very important post

Denial patterns: 
  1. I have difficulty identifying what I am feeling. — So busy are you with SGI activities and ingratiating yourself to higher level leaders. 
  2. minimize, alter or deny how I truly feel. — about the SGI mentor disciple teachings, for example. 
  3. I perceive myself as completely unselfish and dedicated to the well being of others. — Even chanting for a female marijuana seed is an activity for SGI and Kosen Rufu. 
Low self-esteem patterns: 
  1. I have difficulty making decisions. — Seeking guidance from every SGI Tom, Dick, and Harry. 
  2. I judge everything I think, say or do harshly, as never “good enough.” — You need to rededicate yourself to SGI, more meetings, more activities. 
  3. I am embarrassed to receive recognition and praise or gifts. — Only the mentor can receive such praise and gifts. 
  4. I do not ask others to meet my needs or desires. — I live for the Soka Gakkai and protecting the mentor. 
  5. I value others’ approval of my thinking, feelings and behavior over my own. — What if my leader should tell me I have weak faith or I am shunned for my beliefs? 
Compliance patterns: 
  1. I compromise my own values and integrity to avoid rejection or others’ anger. — Never voicing one’s doubts, uncertainties, or criticisms of the SGI 
  2. I am very sensitive to how others are feeling and feel the same. — What if the others reject me for the way I feel [or don't feel] about the mentor, for example? 
  3. I am extremely loyal, remaining in harmful situations too long. — Loyalty prized above actual accomplishment in the Soka Gakkai. 
  4. I value others’ opinions and feelings more than my own and am afraid to express differing opinions and feelings of my own. –See above. 
  5. I put aside my own interests and hobbies in order to do what others want. — More meetings, May Contribution and August shakubuku campaigns, for example 
Control patterns: 
  1. I believe most other people are incapable of taking care of themselves. — Giving guidance whether or not guidance is sought. 
  2. I attempt to convince others of what they “should” think and how they “truly” feel. — “President Ikeda says we should…” 
  3. I become resentful when others will not let me help them. — “You lack faith”. 
  4. I freely offer others advice and directions without being asked. — see above


  1. I was a member of SGI for 18 years. This so effectively summarises my own experience. I left the organisation and started living on my own terms. It was a challenge at first. I had to unravel the programmed thinking I was brainwashed into. But life is good. There are ups. There are downs. They happen. It's great to know the gohonzon and Sensei do not control anything. Life and the true power of the universe is with you all the time. You don't need to chant to access it. You don't need to give your time to the SGI to access it. You don't need to give money to the organisation to access it. Let's face it. The mystic law is the universe we live in. It doesn't franchise itself to one small religious organisation.
    So thanks for the insight in this post. It reminds me how far I've come since I left the SGI behind. My career took off. I spent more time with my family. I was happy to slander and then like many in the world to reflect on my anger and feel ok about that.
    SGI makes you feel they own the keys to your life. They don't.
    The only thing I feel now about giving 18 precious years of my life to SGI is shame. Shame that I was stupid enough to be taken in by it.

  2. Have you chanted Namu Myoho renge kyo? Give it a try and you don't need to chant for hours, just a few minutes a day. Let us know what you think.