Various schools of Nichiren Buddhism represented as menu items [a future Top Ten Post]

Various schools of Nichiren Buddhism represented as menu items by: Nine Lives Fri Jan 20, 2012 at 00:42:07 AM PST

A fun Friday flashback to the year 2000 by our own Christian Oaks. The more things change, the more they stay the same. Read it on the flip....

Nine Lives :: Various schools of Nichiren Buddhism represented as menu items

ENTREES All entrees come with some form of mantra invocation. Please specify whether you prefer nam- or namu- in your (O)daimoku. Seared Butsuryu Gongyo-free devotion marinated in okozui and "sacred formula." Showered with sparks struck from flint. Xylophone on the side. Shoshu Roll Narrow strips of exclusivist orthodoxy accompanied by extremely rare ushitora gongyo. Wrapped in priestly robes, sprinkled with Sho Hondo dust. American Independent Platter Spit-roasted dissent, piled high with questions. Flavored with a subtle hint of bitters. Shoshin-kai Tender, early sprouts of reform, cut down and hung out to dry. With whine vinaigrette. The Minobu Amulets smothered in mysticism, served on a mandala from our gift shop. Gakkai Special A mix of everything, changing daily. Please ask server for details. Comes with a commemorative Forever Sensei kool-aid shot glass. Baked Kempon Hokke Small portion of something. No one ever orders this. We're not sure what it is. * DESSERT Fujufuse  Half the calories and none of the fat of regular ice cream. Made from the milk of strictly practicing cows. Sorry, cannot be served to slanderers or nonbelievers. Assorted Salty, Stinky Fish Candy Like a lot of things, this represents Japanese culture more than the teachings of Nichiren Buddhism. But don't let that stop you from incorporating it into your practice. Yum. Chocolate Maltz