Sunday, July 25, 2021

Diogenes The Funniest Greek Philosopher

https://www.theodysseyonline.com/diogenes/he-once-said-in-a-rich-mans-house-there-is-no-place-to-spit-but-his-face 

Diogenes of Sinope was an eccentric man from around 400 BC and is known as one of the founders of Cynicism, an ancient Greek school of thought that promoted virtue and living naturally, without desires for wealth and social status. The philosopher was incredibly wise, and (hilariously) controversial. Here are some of his most legendary moments.

Diogenes was petty about Plato's ideas.

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When Plato defined a man as a "featherless biped," Diogenes released a plucked chicken in Plato's Academy and proclaimed, "Behold! I've brought you a man!" The two philosophers were often at odds with each other, and Plato remarked that Diogenes was "a Socrates gone mad."

He would hold lanterns to passersby’s faces in Athens, saying that he was searching for an honest man.

Diogenes in Search of an Honest Man

I mean, me too, Diogenes. Me too.

Alexander the Great was a big fan, but the feelings were not mutual.

"Alexander und Diogenes"

Lovis Corinth, 1894, at the Graphische Sammlung Albertina

The renowned Macadeonian monarch came to visit Diogenes one day and found him leisurely lying in the sun. When Alexander asked him if he wanted anything, he replied, "Stand a little out of my sun." As an extreme minimalist, Diongenes did not respect Alexander's lifestyle. As philosopher Plutarch writes, "It is said that Alexander was so struck by this, and admired so much the haughtiness and grandeur of the man who had nothing but scorn for him, that he said to his followers, who were laughing and jesting about the philosopher as they went away, "But truly, if I were not Alexander, I wish I were Diogenes."" In turn, Diogenes replied, "If I were not Diogenes, I would still wish to be Diogenes."

Diogenes urinated, defecated, and masturbated in public.

Diogenes embraced taboo and obscene subjects. He believed that man should be independent from societal norms and rejected the restrictions of bodily functions. Any action that was accepted in private settings should be accepted in public settings as well.

He strengthened his mental fortitude by rolling in hot sand and hugging statues covered in snow.

Just to feel something, I guess.

Diogenes admired dogs, and his behavior was often described as being dog-like.

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He explained, "I fawn on those who give me anything, I yelp at those who refuse, and I set my teeth in rascals." He praised the animal for being simple-minded, anxiety-free, and intuitive.

Diogenes died at 89, but his cause of death is theorized over.

His contemporaries say that he held his breath until he passed. Others say that he died from a rabid dog bite. And another account says that he ate raw octopus and got sick.

He wanted his body to be eaten by wild animals.

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Seems like a strange request, right? But he believed that he should give back to the world after taking from it. Diogenes contemplated, "If I lack awareness, then why should I care what happens to me when I am dead?" Thus, his dying wish ultimately reflected his down-to-earth nature, in a quite literal sense.

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