So special

                           

I learned many bad habits in the Gakkai that hurt me for many years until I finally awoke. The magical thinking about Namu Myoho renge kyo and SGI activities was the most destructive thing I learned: "If you chant and do lots of activities, you will be always victorious ", "If you chant and do SGI activities, all your dreams will definitely come true", "Nothing is more valuable than your efforts for Kosen Rufu [signifying SGI activities]", and lastly, "The only memories you will have of this life are those of helping others practice within the Soka Gakkai." SGI members might ask, why are these teachings destructive? One comes to believe that one is special and can not possibly err. This leads to arrogance and mediocrity. For many years I felt that because I chanted and did SGI activities, I would succeed regardless of the effort poured into work and family, areas of life not directly related to chanting and SGI activities. Despite their faith equals daily life rhetoric and spin on the Daishonin's teachings, SGI actually discouraged daily life at the expense of endless SGI activities day after day and year after year. Before I knew it, my daily life is in shambles and the years passed without having realized my potential. Fortunately, I got out with enough time to salvage my daily life, realizing that I have to pour everything into my family and profession, not only my Buddhist practice.